I Am Going To Die

by Roof Doctor

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    Compact Disc (CD)

    Cardboard sleeve with High-Gloss UV Coat. Kevin remastered the album so now it sounds real good. Starts shipping 12/20/2012.

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1.
02:35
2.
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02:45
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7.
04:45

about

Recorded, mixed, and mastered between February and May 2012 by Kevin Paschall. Album Art by Alex Amici. Special thanks to The Womb, Smoother, Ween, Dick Nixon, and everyone who helped with gang vocals.

credits

released 13 July 2012

Mark Harper - Vocals and Guitar
Kevin Paschall - Drums and Vocals
Alex Stackhouse - Lead Guitar
Sean Reilly - Bass Guitar and Vocals
Chet Williams - Vocals and Saxophone
Abi Reimold - Vocals
Arianna Conover - Vocals
Mariel Celentano - Vocals

CDs available through Maggot House Records
maggothouserecords.bandcamp.com

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Track Name: Ocean City
I could use some time somewhere else
where I could lay down with all of my friends
and maybe go for a swim
because right now the city seems way too big

and we'll be drunk by 5 PM
and then we'll go for a walk
score some pizza out a garbage bin
pass out and wake up by 9 o'clock

city slicker I hardly miss her
my head is bursting at the seams
and I am drifting out to sea

wicked blisters mental twisters
all day long down at the beach
this whole day has been a dream
and now I'm drifting off to sleep
Track Name: Thanks For The Blankets
I don't know if you're just afraid of expectations
or if my emotions have made things too complicated
but what I do know is you made me feel at home
and now that I'm alone again I can't help but feel jaded

would it be wrong to say that I was led on
when we shared a bed for a month were we just having fun
cause to me it seemed like we were together
though not technically and maybe that's for the better

am I allowed to feel like I'm a husk of a man
who cannot comprehend the things that you have done to him
or if that's too sensational then
I guess I could pretend that nothing happened and we're just friends

It had a major impact on my self esteem
I'll play it cool and then I'll bury it down deep
my brain could use a little reprogramming
cause what you get is really not what you see
Track Name: Mark Dog
don't go back to shore
life there's such a bore
put your arm around your brother
tell your mother that you love her

you'll never find yourself if you're always on the run
work everyday and you'll never get anything done
it can't be feast or famine
or else your heart's bound to cave in

write your name down and never mind all of this chatter
never forget who you are where you're from and who matters
lay down and let that warm sun hit you
think all about the folks that miss you

don't go back to shore
life there's such a bore
put your arm around your brother
tell your mother that you love her
Track Name: I Am Going To Die
When I die
I will die alone
I will burn every bridge that extends to the people I've known
having neither a family nor friend that I can call my own
and having exhausted your sympathies
I'll withdrawal from this world with one pithy remark

I will work
little hours each day
being stretched far too thin while I piss all my earnings away
school may have been fun but I know now that I cannot stay
likely I'll think I'm an artist
I'll dither and die in food service someday

oh my friends
how they're going to try
to respect my thoughts and want me to be part of their lives
but when we're adults we will be separated by miles
and I'll be a distant memory
while they've got their children and families oh well

When I die
I will die alone
I will burn every bridge that extends to the people I've known
having neither a family nor friend that I can call my own
and having exhausted your sympathies
I'll withdrawal from this world with one pithy remark

and this pit
this pit in my heart
will continue to grow while my family and I fall apart
at least brother will be there to make me feel like I am smart
he'll know that this is a fool's errand
but otherwise I'd still be wishing it was what I did

I will love
and I will treat them right
there will never be someone who won't leave me after a time
either by cheating on me or by simply letting me slide
I want it but I don't believe in it
and I'm too stubborn to be proven wrong

When I die
I will die alone
I will burn every bridge that extends to the people I've known
having neither a family nor friend that I can call my own
and having exhausted your sympathies
I'll withdrawal from this world with one pithy remark
Track Name: Dishwasher with a Dishwasher
i try not to be a mopey guy
and i try not to be in front of my friends when i cry
but i'm finding when i keep all of my anger cooped inside
that trying isn't really worth the time

so i spend too much of that up in my room
i am alone i won't pick up my phone especially for you
because you piss me off more than all of the other people do
i know that nothing that you said to me was true

and now i'm glad that i am seeing someone new
i hate being on the back burner and not having a clue
and unlike with you my feelings will not cause her to resist
yeah she is a really great psychologist

I'm glad that i just started a job
eight hours washing dishes and my brain will just turn off
it lets me pass out and not confront any of my thoughts
i guess that means my sleep problem is solved

in the fall i am going back to school
you could say that in the past few years i have been to a few
and i think i might be going for something i'd like to do
but if that does not pan out i'll still be cool
but if that does not pan out i wont be cool
but if that does not pan out i'll still be cool
but if that does not pan out i wont be cool
Track Name: Family: Mark Do Better
uncle got me out of a lot of shit
mother gave me warmth and food and sleep
father gave me what I should not be
brother let me in his company

I appreciate this
life has given me too much and now I want to be a better man
but I'm a coward
I doubt that I'll ever become anything that I can respect

Nick drove my drunk ass back in my car
same one grandma gave me when she died
covered now in scratches dents and scars
am I an adult cause I can drive

sometimes we take more than what we give
don't know if we're right or we're selfish
get in fights with family over nothing
let the months slide cause we're lazy

like to think that I'm a funny guy
all wrapped up in jokes and revelry
wondering how long this can sustain
is acting young when old done in vain

how is it that I can work and play
soon enough I will have bills to pay
I get stressed out enough as it is
I am so small and my life is so big

uncle got me out of a lot of shit
mother gave me warmth and food and sleep
father gave me what I should not be
brother let me in his company

I appreciate this
life has given me too much and now I want to be a better man
but I'm young now
contemplating about things that I am far too young to understand
Track Name: Soda Jerk
I'm tired
and I'm a cynical failure
and I've wasted two years of my life

can't meet
anyone without feeling
like the whole god damned experience is trite

so I'll cut off
from them
how could I meet anyone who could possibly be my true friend

my thoughts
are going in circles
and it'd take a miracle to stop

I'm stuck
in a downward spiral
where I feel worse for doing the things I want

so I'll cut off
from myself
what's the sense in being concerned at all with my feelings or my health

good times
are much more infrequent
and I feel my body aging way too fast

the kids
keep trying to show me
that there is some hope that this bad phase will pass

but I don't know who I am
plans and words fall out
but I doubt that they will ever happen